0:13 Lucky Strike commercial. Cigarettes dancing as legs, square dance song.
1:14 Dennis James advertising Old Gold Cigarettes. People tap dance with cigarette pack bodies.
2:20 Muriel 10 cent cigars. Animated cigars do vaudeville; “why don’t you pick me up and smoke me sometime?”
3:28 “Snow Fresh” Kool Cigarettes: “As cool and as clean as a breath of fresh air. ”
4:37 The Marlboro Man: “I’m a guy who likes to work on my car. I like to take it apart and put it back together. I get to working on it and forget where I am, what time it is. I even forget to eat!” “You don’t forget to smoke, though?” “I always smoke when I work.” “Filter, flavor, flip-top box!”
5:47 Robert Burns cigars. Man recalls childhood memories of wanting to smoke cigars.
6:55 Winston Cigarettes: “Winston tastes good like a cigarette should!”
7:40 Chesterfields. Western frontier men take pleasure in Chesterfield Kings.
8:46 Ajax Cleanser. Animated elves clean bath accessories.
9:58 Viking Derwood Kirby sells SOS Pads live on Gary Moore show.
12:30 Raid bug killer. Animated bugs get hunted down like radar, plants stay healthy.
13:36 Kleenex Table Napkins sold by miniature butler.
14:40 Mr. Clean Cartoon of Mr. Clean helping clean the house.
15:44 Tide Clean. Family playing on beach basks in warm cleanliness of tide-cleansed products. “The cleanest clean under the sun is Tide Clean!”
16:47 Bufferin. Bufferin presents itself as better headache solution than Aspirin.
17:52 Speedy Alka-Seltzer. Clay-mation Speedy describes the use of Alka-Seltzer in the American Capital, the morning after Mardi Gras.
19:01 Band Aid Plastic Strips. Band aids stick to egg through hard-boiling.
20:09 Band Aid Plastic Bandages (in color). Colored bandages are described through mention of colour and weird stretching video effect. Stars ‘n’ Strips, Strips ‘n’ Spots.
21:15 Gillette razor blades. Dancing macaw rocks and rolls to Gillette Blue Blades jingle.
21:56 Remington Electric Shaver. Remington shaver can both shave hair off peach without damaging surface, as well as shave bristles off hairbrush.
23:02 Pee Wee Reese of the Dodgers presents himself as roll model by suggesting impressionable youths use Gillette razors.
24:03 Mum deodorant. Film Noir commercial where “secret” messages about Mum deodorant are spread through whispers.
25:15 Pepsodent Toothpaste. Animated teenagers sell tooth paste as key to popularity with opposite sex, using new M-3 ingredient.
26:22 Miss Clairol hair color. “Does she or doesn’t she?” Only her hair stylist knows. Makes women “look as wonderful as they feel.”
27:26 Crest toothpaste. “Dentist says: No New Cavities!” Crest toothpaste adverti ses fluoride ingredient in the family. Little girl yells, “Look Mom, no cavities!”
28:32 Lipton chicken noodle soup. Man on live television enjoys bowl of Lipton soup, imagining himself in Paris in the Spring, or May in the Bronx. Host doubts actual physical presence of chicken in the product. TAPE ENDS BEFORE END OF COMMERCIAL.
31:58 TAPE END